It's hard to imagine what your life would have turned out to be if you had had it your way. Because when you compare what you were and where you've been to what you've become and where you are now it's hard to handle that huge schism, especially when what you were was a far cry from what you've become and deciding whether your glass is half empty or half full could drive you to madness. I know because that crossroad has come full circle and I find myself in the midst of a bottomless pit or the pinnacle of a new beginning...depending how I decide to view my circumstances. I have yet to make a conclusion, but I find myself leaning more towards the pinnacle of my life and these emotions as a result of my reminiscence of my past life that has long left me yet still remains ever present in my soul.
One decision in my life has become certain and, somewhat, intriguing; after many years I've be able to convince my husband that it is time for a memoir in his honor, and I'm just the person to accomplish this task. He and I share a past without ever having know each other, which is why we're able to connect and love as much as we do. As far back as I can remember I've talked and bragged about becoming an author and writing a book. I didn't know why or what type of book...just a book about something. That's probably why most of my peers thought I was delusional because I could never explain exactly what I had in mind...'til now. For those who know my husband, Christopher Scott Keithly, he's lived a life most could not or WOULD not fathom. By the grace of God he's prevailed over his circumstance and, now, still lives to tell about his experiences. For those who do not know my husband...well, you'll just have to wait for the book.
So many things are happening all at once it's hard to keep my stomach in check. The constant swirling of my head keeps me in a perpetual world of dizziness. Feeling excited most days for the changes that are coming and, yet, an ever constant sense of caution of fear from the unknown. Yet God, in all His wonderment, has a way of calming the spirit...I call this His grace and mercy. So I'm going to enjoy the ride while and I can and see what develops.
Well, I'm off to market to buy a fat pig (or in my case, a good set of working tools: pencils, pens, pads and plenty of boxes of tissue). Keep in touch. Wouldn't want anyone to miss out on all the fun that I promise to bring to the party!
Should anyone have any input to share to my enterprise look for me in the deep recesses of the darkest part of your minds there you shall find me lost in my own state of Delphian.
